as some of you may already know, i am addicted to the obituaries. it's the first (and sometimes only) section of the newspaper i read.
recently, i read a memorial posted for my 3rd grade teacher. emma schwartzsteen was 87 years old, which means when i had her as a teacher, she was only in her mid 40's. gadz. i just assumed she was much older. i remember she had a very furry face and wore this red lipstick that would bleed into the dark peach fuzz on her upper lip. she wore face powder that would glisten in the sun. so not only did she sport a moustache but if the light was right, her top lip sparkled. :) it was a bit scary, but you couldn't really see it unless you were up close. i liked miss schwartzsteen. she was very nice to me as i was one of her best students. i should mention here, i grew up trenton, nj attending very inner-city public schools. excelling was not exactly difficult. i was typically teachers pet thruout my gradeschool years. my first grade teacher was ms. watson. she got divorced then she re-married and became mrs. ozenbaugh. she loved me. she had this fabulous southern drawl that she never lost, even tho she lived in nj like the rest of us. and when the boys would act up? mrs. ozenbaugh would take them by the ear and walk them to the back of the room where she'd make them put their head down on a desk for a time out. truly. she would pull them by their ear and walk them to the back. it was great. she had curly fire red hair, and always wore matching jewelry. necklace, earrings and bracelet, always in the same pattern, always matching her outfits. when i was in the 5th grade, mrs. ozenbaugh was shot by her ex-husband. her murder made the front pages of every newspaper. i wanted to go to the funeral, but my mom wouldn't let me. in the 6th grade, we had a first year teacher. our class was very out of control and she could not handle us (them). boy, was she out of her element. she cried every single day, right in front of us. she suffered a nervous breakdown and left 3 months into the school year. she was replaced by a teacher whose name was bob stretch. (no lie) nobody liked mr. stretch. we almost gave him a nervous breakdown as well, but he hung in there. he was more strict obviously, and eventually, he whipped us (them) into shape. when i was in the 9th grade, i remember walking to jr. high and a car kept honking; a male voice kept calling my name. it was mr. stretch. ugh. he icked me out and i pretended not to hear him. he followed me slowly in his car for over a block! totally creeped me out. i guess he always creeped me out, but by then i had boobs and everything so his intentions were crystal clear. (at least to me)
in high school not alot changed. i was editor of both the school newspaper and yearbook so i had alot of free reign. my sophomore english teacher was a curmudgeonly old man by the name of hyman yudewitz. (swear to god i am not making that name up either) he was a vegan with snow white hair. he did not believe in perfumes/chemicals and never wore deodorant. he wore one shirt for the entire week. he usually smelled pretty bad and everyday wore suspenders and polyester loafers. (where he got those i'll never know but i swear, they were fabric loafers) my friend wanda once put thumbtacks on his chair and he sat on them. his butt literally flew up off his chair. we about peed our pants it was so funny. we're talking 10th grade here. mr. yudewitz was not amused. we never saw him get so angry. his face got very red and he had blue eyes. with the white hair he reminded me of the american flag. having said all this, hymie must have had a special place in his heart for me. he entered a few essays of mine into a local literary magazine publication and I won first place as well as second AND third. it was almost suspicious, but if you could have read the other entries, you'd understand. i still have the savings bonds that the junior contemporary club awarded me for winning. what exactly is a jr. contemporary club anyway?
i often wonder if i had to do my school years over again, would i do anything differently? would you?
recently, i read a memorial posted for my 3rd grade teacher. emma schwartzsteen was 87 years old, which means when i had her as a teacher, she was only in her mid 40's. gadz. i just assumed she was much older. i remember she had a very furry face and wore this red lipstick that would bleed into the dark peach fuzz on her upper lip. she wore face powder that would glisten in the sun. so not only did she sport a moustache but if the light was right, her top lip sparkled. :) it was a bit scary, but you couldn't really see it unless you were up close. i liked miss schwartzsteen. she was very nice to me as i was one of her best students. i should mention here, i grew up trenton, nj attending very inner-city public schools. excelling was not exactly difficult. i was typically teachers pet thruout my gradeschool years. my first grade teacher was ms. watson. she got divorced then she re-married and became mrs. ozenbaugh. she loved me. she had this fabulous southern drawl that she never lost, even tho she lived in nj like the rest of us. and when the boys would act up? mrs. ozenbaugh would take them by the ear and walk them to the back of the room where she'd make them put their head down on a desk for a time out. truly. she would pull them by their ear and walk them to the back. it was great. she had curly fire red hair, and always wore matching jewelry. necklace, earrings and bracelet, always in the same pattern, always matching her outfits. when i was in the 5th grade, mrs. ozenbaugh was shot by her ex-husband. her murder made the front pages of every newspaper. i wanted to go to the funeral, but my mom wouldn't let me. in the 6th grade, we had a first year teacher. our class was very out of control and she could not handle us (them). boy, was she out of her element. she cried every single day, right in front of us. she suffered a nervous breakdown and left 3 months into the school year. she was replaced by a teacher whose name was bob stretch. (no lie) nobody liked mr. stretch. we almost gave him a nervous breakdown as well, but he hung in there. he was more strict obviously, and eventually, he whipped us (them) into shape. when i was in the 9th grade, i remember walking to jr. high and a car kept honking; a male voice kept calling my name. it was mr. stretch. ugh. he icked me out and i pretended not to hear him. he followed me slowly in his car for over a block! totally creeped me out. i guess he always creeped me out, but by then i had boobs and everything so his intentions were crystal clear. (at least to me)
in high school not alot changed. i was editor of both the school newspaper and yearbook so i had alot of free reign. my sophomore english teacher was a curmudgeonly old man by the name of hyman yudewitz. (swear to god i am not making that name up either) he was a vegan with snow white hair. he did not believe in perfumes/chemicals and never wore deodorant. he wore one shirt for the entire week. he usually smelled pretty bad and everyday wore suspenders and polyester loafers. (where he got those i'll never know but i swear, they were fabric loafers) my friend wanda once put thumbtacks on his chair and he sat on them. his butt literally flew up off his chair. we about peed our pants it was so funny. we're talking 10th grade here. mr. yudewitz was not amused. we never saw him get so angry. his face got very red and he had blue eyes. with the white hair he reminded me of the american flag. having said all this, hymie must have had a special place in his heart for me. he entered a few essays of mine into a local literary magazine publication and I won first place as well as second AND third. it was almost suspicious, but if you could have read the other entries, you'd understand. i still have the savings bonds that the junior contemporary club awarded me for winning. what exactly is a jr. contemporary club anyway?
i often wonder if i had to do my school years over again, would i do anything differently? would you?
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